Letter to the Editor

Dear Bipedals,

Speaking for the Association of Fermented Bison, I feel it neccessary to point out that neither candidate has taken the issues that fermented bison face seriously. We call on the major party candidates for president to show us that fermented bison are indeed considered part of the American political scene. I would like to point out, for example, that it was a brigade of fermented bison that made D-Day possible, that it was fermented bison that invented the plastic squeeze bottle, and that Polka King Frankie Yankovich is indeed a fermented bison.

We call on both major party candidates to prove that they do, indeed, have our interests at heart. If not, they will lose the fermented bison vote and alienate a vital, vibrant part of the American landscape.

Yours Truly,

Q.P. Fnort,
President, Association For Fermented Bison
(Est. 1867)

A Fermented Bison